I was surprised when a colleague told me, “Hurry is the antidote to spirituality.” It struck a chord, but I wasn’t convinced—until I started listening to The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer.
This book has illuminated a truth I’ve sensed but struggled to articulate: the hurried pace of modern life is robbing me of my emotional and spiritual health.
Rediscovering the Power of Disconnecting
A few years ago, I had a powerful habit: I would spend 2-4 hours, 2-3 times a week, with my phone and computer off, placed in a separate room. Sitting only with my journal, a notebook, and pen, I’d settle on my couch with a pillow on my lap.
During these moments, I’d reflect on my work dreams, sketch constellations of people I’d like to bring together, prepare for upcoming conversations, think about what to-do’s can fall to the back burner, and think about how I wanted to show up for my kids, family, and community. This couple hours without devices would leave me with a profound sense of spaciousness and clarity. If I had the urge to check an email or look something up, I’d simply jot it down for later.
At the end of each session, I’d write a short mantra—two or three words—to help me anchor the spacious feeling I’d cultivated. It was an incredibly rejuvenating practice. But over the past couple of years, I fell out of the habit.
The Case for Slowing Down
Recently, I’ve been overwhelmed again — and longing for this old writing practice. I’ve also been jolted by Comer’s pointing to some sobering statistics about our relationship with devices:
- We spend hours each day scrolling through email and social media – the dopamine is real.
- We check or pick up our phones thousands of times per day. (even if we think we’re just going to spend 1-2 minutes sending a text message, we get pulled in.)
- This adds up to hundreds of hours each year, often increasing our anxiety and scattering our attention.
These stats hit close to home. I could feel how much time I was giving away, not just to my phone but to the hurried, fragmented mindset it fosters.
I’m falling out of relationship with where I know I’m most nourished for my most important work.
Inspired by Intentional Living
I’ve also been inspired by a friend, Greg, who doesn’t own a smartphone. At times, I feel frustrated that I can’t send him audio messages, but I deeply admire his intentionality.
Greg’s choice reflects his commitment to being present—with his family, his young kids, and his community. Whenever I interact with him, his quality of presence is striking. It’s a lifestyle I aspire to emulate.
I also think about Wendell Berry — and his skepticism around technology. And the Amish and their communal discernment processes around whether a new technology will help bring them closer to the lives they want.
Small Steps Toward Presence
Inspired by Greg and John Mark Comer’s book, I’ve started making changes:
- Phone-Free Time: I now spend 6-10 hours a day with my phone off and in another part of the house.
- Morning Journaling: I’ve returned to my practice of starting the day with a journal and notebook, free from screens.
I’m also trying to figure out how to not use my phone at all in the car. I’ve left my phone at home a few times this past week. I want to figure this one out.
These small shifts are helping me rediscover the spaciousness, joy and intentionality I’ve missed.
I’m sensing this will be so important in this upcoming season.
A New Framework for Spiritual Health
John Mark Comer offers a framework that resonates deeply: the path to emotional health and deeper spirituality lies in practices like silence, solitude, and sabbath.
I’ve known the power of contemplative prayer and silence, but I hadn’t connected them to how my device—and my hurried, scattered mind—pulls me away from being present.
Comer’s call to “apprentice to Jesus” has reframed my perspective. The practices of this apprenticeship start with re-committing to intentional new relationship to my devices, that will give more space for solitude and silence.
Next, I’m hoping to have a conversation with my family how we might really embrace the rest that honoring the sabbath calls us to.
Un-Hurrying My Life
The antidote to hurry isn’t just about less time on my phone or fewer distractions. It’s about returning to the kind of intentional, grounded life I want to lead. The spaciousness that allows for love. I want to re-ground myself in gratitude and allow myself to love my family, friends, neighbors, colleagues and partners.
By embracing this un-hurrying work, I’m making space for the things that matter most.